ACOTAR: Chapter 5

[atualamadeus]

A bit of a nothing burger, to be honest. Ah, well. That's how it goes sometimes. This was maybe 5 pages long, very quick.


 

1. "But a while mare was patiently waiting..." Am I allowed to critique this (pg. 42) - Being told not to start a sentence with "but" was something I was taught very early on and was only revoked with the assumption that I knew how and when to use it correctly (a rule I do not follow outside of creative or academic writing). I'm not sure if it's fair for me to slap her hand and say "don't do that", but I'm doing it here. Don't do that. It's clunky.


2. "...my stomach clenched..." #IBSwarrior (pg. 42) - I have noticed many descriptions with her stomach. I am sure there will be many more to come. Did SJM ever write in a bismuth brew for our girl?


3. "The beast had burned my ash arrow--so I'd have to rely on luck to get even a splinter of wood again, if I was to stand a chance of killing them" No. (pg. 43) - This punctuation sucks. What the fuck are we doing with our clauses here. That comma should not be there. That em dash doesn't need to be there either. I can appreciate a good em dash, I can! But this is too much for me. Where is your editor. I have some words.


4. "My stomach turned" Take some pepto, girl (pg. 44) - Honestly I forgot I wrote that when I was making that joke in #2. There are many ways to describe dread without making it sound like you're constantly about to shit yourself.


5. "'Do you have a name?' Or anything to cure him by" Ha. (pg. 45) - Yeah I'll laugh at that.


6. "How long had he kept me unconscious, rather than have to speak to me?" I'd do that too, tbh (pg. 46) - Annotation says it all.


7. "Bastard." Real. (pg. 46) - Bastard is a really underappreciated word, nobody uses it anymore. I love calling people bastards! It's good for the soul!

Final thoughts on Chapter 5: No real emotions at all for this one outside of my snide little comments. It definitely didn't make me hate the book more, but there wasn't much else for me to feel, either. So. Here's to hoping the next one has a little more substance.